For all the autohotkey writers out there, you can make it so that the you scroll chat down, have host/leecher whisper each other, then right click name, then left click join to solve friends list issue. This way, you wont have to remove all your friends. ****NOTE**** Chat position in menus is different from chat position in game so leechers should start out in a game. Although the whole whisper and join process would take less than 1/2 of a second, if you are worry about it messing up, just make sure to disable all quest texts and notifications in Social.
Also, an approach to clicking on adria would be to have the host move away from spawn position prior to the leecher joining. This will result in the leecher spawning at the same spot every time making pixel detection unnecessary.
Have fun coding!