[Guide] - How to WOW: An in depth analysis

[falarious]

In light of stupidity around the world and because I am bored, a thread on how to WoW with an in depth analysis is needed and I decided to write one up.

This guide is formatted to break the ice (in other words, keep you, the reader, reading) during the first few paragraphs then develops into a serious "How to WoW Guide" towards the end.


How to Log On
What you must first do is locate the WoW icon on your desktop. The icon has a W on it, you can't miss it. If you can not find it, please reffer to the following screenshot.



If you still have no idea where it is, please stop reading now and GTFO.

Now, doing this next step is tricky. You have to double click the icon. To do this, remove your hand from your pants and grab the mouse. Here is the hard part, click 2 times semi fast until a window pops up that looks something like this.



Here is the grand daddy of all quantum complexity. If you are the type of person that can not follow directions, please stop reading now, otherwise, keep on.

AS you can see, there are 2 boxes. One is for your account name and the other is for your password. In the top box, type in your account name and on the bottom box type in your password. One mistake here and you are vulnerable to epic failness.

Thats it for the log on part. Now, to make a character.

Making a character.
The first step in making a character is simple. Choose the correct server. By correct, I mean a server that has a low population. FOR THE LOVE OF YOUR MOTHER, DO NOT ENTER A FULL SERVER. Doing so will cause a polarity shift on earth causing massive earthquakes and giant red lizards appearing unver your bed.

AS far as the TYPE goes, it is your choosing. If you like to get pwned, choose PVP. If you like to be a noob, go PVE. If you like to have meaningless emote conversations with people you will probably never meet, choose PVP.

Once you got that out of the way, you will see a screen that looks like this.



What you want to do now is click the Create a New character button. This is the part where you stop going to that "page", get your hands out of your pants and pay the **** attention because what you do next WILL have a great affect in your WOW experience.

You will be presented with the following page.



It is here where you decide what you want to be.

WARNING: IT IS A MUST TO CHOOSE THE HORDE SIDE.
Horde will aways > Alliance

Why?
Noobs. That is all I have to say. This information is what many people all across the alliance servers WISH they knew when they first started. Now, all alliance are forever doomed to meaningless trade chat anomolies.

After you make your character and choose your class and how she/he looks, its time for a name. YOu can try the randomizer if you want but usually the names that pop out are not as creative. Choosing your name can only be done once and after that you have to pay Blizzard $$$ for a change. Your name is probably the most important thing about your character next to gear and whatnot. When people see your name they associate it to something in their lives. If they see a name such as, "Pringle" they will laugh and giggle and remember the good times when they ate that particular chip. On the other hand if your name is something like "mepwnyou" or something that seems like a good name such as "darkness" can bring you bad luck. The other players may look at you and subconsciously think that they themselves getting pwned is something they would not enjoy. And the name darkness can bring back horrible childhood memories of when they went to confess their sins to the priest and something out of the ordinary happened and were told to keep secret and the prince of darkness would come and get them in their sleep, a place which is normally dark too.


Now comes the actual playing. AFter you got all that out of the way, click accept, and click enter world. You are now a WOW player. Your goal as a level 1 is to quest and reach 70 (or 80 once WOTLK comes out).

This is all I have for now. I will be adding more to this post as time passes.

Peace

[Emuchild]

It's a good guide, but why need a guide? When you buy WoW the manual tells you how to do this. O.o

[falarious]

If you spend time reading the guide you will realize that some of the information on here is not on the manual. Even if it was, who reads the manual anways? Threads > Manual imo