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  1. #1
    Kenneth's Avatar OwnedCore News Correspondent
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    OwnedCore Report #88 - A Totally Serious Classic WoW Guide>Sponsored by Eldorado<

    One week. Who would have thought Classic WoW would be coming out in 1 week! This Report will be all about preparing for Classic WoW!

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    The Ultimate Classic WoW Prep

    So you want to play Classic WoW? You think you do but you....do! Let's break down how to prepare for Classic WoW into 3 main categories.

    • Food

    • Class, Race, Faction Choice

    • Life Choices


    If you wan't to play Classic WoW right you need to get your food prep right. Some people out there will tell you to stay away from the energy drinks and junk food for the alternative water and celery sticks with peanut butter. This couldn't be further from the right move. If you're going to play Classic WoW you have to play it right. Many of us played Classic back in Middle School, High School, College. Nobody was drinking water back then! It's time to reunite with your former self and really get your hands on the good stuff that will give you the energy you need to sit in queue for 7 hours on launch. What good is vitamin rich foods when your server is restarting in 15 minutes right after you got in after a long queue? Nothing, that's what.

    Spicy Nugs. I don't care if your EU or NA there is nothing better than the recently reintroduced spicy nugs from Wendy's and it turns out you can get a BUCKET of them for $9.99 in the U.S! This is what I call gamer fuel. Imagine this. Your sitting in queue on Herod for 3 hours and get in. Durotar is packed but you manage to finish your lazy peons quest. Until something pops up on the bottom left of your screen.

    Now what? Do you keep leveling? What if there's a roll back? How long will you be in queue for once it restarts? None of this matters if you have a bucket of spicy nuggets by your side. The answer is in the nugs.

    Ok I get it. Spicy nugs means more thirst. What ever will you drink to wash down that heat? I've watched enough Hot Ones on Youtube to know that water is bait and milk isn't the play because your best friend is playing a Tauren so that would just make things even more awkward. The answer lies at the nearest 7/11. It's 3 in the morning when the servers went down and you're in another queue for an estimated 3 hours. Wtf is going to be open at 3 in the morning to quench your thirst of the 25 nugs you just emotionally gobbled down after being booted off the server? I'll tell you what.

    Slurpees. These sugary delights can come in all sorts of flavors such as Grape Strawberry, Bloop Razzle, and my personal favorite Cherrysthebomb.com . These behemoths of the beverage industry don't even break the bank. For a gigantic 44 ounce you can spend only $3.00. Nothing will wash the heat away like a 44 ounce sugar coma. By the time you wake up from this coma guess who only has 5 minutest left on their queue? You do my friend. You do.

    Classes, Races, Faction

    Classic, unlike retail, is not forgiving on people who choose to start over. Only real basement dwellers know the cost of an alt in Classic WoW. So what do we normies do about choosing our one and only? Simple. Use a survey I found randomly on Reddit of course.

    Webapp predicts your answers to: World of Warcraft Classes and Races - Clever Surveys

    Now you might be thinking. No way a survey can tell me what I will have fun playing in Classic. Your right but sometimes we need to let Jesus take the wheel and in this case Jesus is a survey made by somebody nobody us knows. But I can give you some tips.

    If your class can go Orc....go Orc. 25% stun resist is broken for PvP.

    Don't like PvP? Follow this rule of thumb. If your class can go Troll...go Troll. Berserking is insane.

    But what if I am Alliance?

    Well you see I didn't expect anybody to ask this. But what I can say is don't sleep on Escape Artist from your Gnome brethren, even you Warriors out there.

    Life Choices

    Some of you might be asking yourself.

    "Do I take off work for Classic?"

    "School is starting the day of Classic launch, do I go?"

    "I have a newborn baby what then?"

    Listen. You have to realize one thing. Classic WoW's launch is temporary. Your children, your work/income, your education. These are all just a cultural abberation. Don't let anybody tell you otherwise. Not your mom, not your wife, and not your child! Classic WoW must be played because there's a bigger battle to be won here that is more than just Classic WoW. It's about sticking it to Blizzard! How will Blizzard ever realize they turned retail into a garbage unless we show them by no-lifing Classic WoW for months on end? This is our only shot. Don't let your successful and mature decisions get in the way of that. If you don't feel like you have it in you to go this hard than let me refer you to this.

    Is this what you want? Store mounts? Because if you don't go hard in Classic WoW this is what comes next.

  2. Thanks hackerlol, Eryxon (2 members gave Thanks to Kenneth for this useful post)
  3. #2
    TehVoyager's Avatar I just love KuRIoS CoreCoins User
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    that clever survey said i should be a Goblin Rogue.


    also that i don't enjoy tanking.

    So i played a Bear druid from Wrath to MOP, Monk tank for MOP and WOD, and a hunter for Legion and BFA, with a side of tank on BFA.

    i'm planning on being a troll hunter for classic.

    That survey couldn't have been more wrong 0/10 xD

    and BTW Kenneth if ur gonna be Alliance, if you're not a caster and can be human, be human. OP racials.
    if ur a caster and can be Gnome, Be Gnome. again, the racials are nuts.
    Priests be Dwarf. Fear. Ward.
    Last edited by TehVoyager; 4 Weeks Ago at 04:24 PM.

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